


Roman's Got a Problem [Logince]

by Sammy_is_obsessed



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Logince - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 07:34:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14807028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy_is_obsessed/pseuds/Sammy_is_obsessed
Summary: Their friendship hadn't always been great and it definitely still had its issues to work out. They fought a lot, arguing on a number of things as if it was the clashing of logic and creativity, a war that neither of them was going to ever win and were just meaningless words spat at each other again and again. Even so, through these unorderly verbal sparring matches, they'd learned things about one another, understanding growing and a friendship blossoming from an initial distaste. With a blooming relationship came the unwanted wringing growth of the weed that was an attraction in this garden of friendship. He'd never imagined that Logan of all the people it could've been, his "Microsoft-nerd" was the one to steal his heart. It wasn't fair!





	Roman's Got a Problem [Logince]

Third Person P.O.V:

Roman sat hunched over numerous amounts of papers with glitter-pen scrawled all across them in messy, rushed handwriting. The dim light of his lamp was about the only thing that illuminated his bedroom, casting Roman's face in almost ominous yellow light. He sighed deeply, running a hand over his face to try and keep himself composed as every bit of him seemed to be on the brink of madness. Composure, as of late, was something that almost completely alluded the pricely man. He'd had a lot on his plate, the demand of keeping up with classes as well as drama, trying to get wonderful roles at other theatres outside of his college's small productions and making sure he attended to his friends. What could he say? He had a lot of stuff going on right now, but calmness and composure was never something Roman's had seemed to lack. Sure, everyone has their off-days from time to time where they aren't feeling quite as fabulous as usual - but Roman had been having far too many as of late and that worried him a great deal. On top of having so much to do Roman had found it increasingly difficult to come up with ideas. With how overactive his imagination usually was this was a major concern to him. He was always writing something down, his head constantly swimming with such creative ideas ... but now there seemed to be nothing. For several days in a row now he'd been at a loss, trying desperately to come up with something he could deem acceptable. That was the problem, Roman's expectations were incredibly high, unrealistically so, especially for himself. It didn't matter that people constantly reminded him that he needed to be reasonable with his expectations and be easier on himself. He felt that it was imperative that everything needed to be perfect, including himself, which was a determinately tall order.

Roman's mindset, though harmful, was never something he'd thought of as negative. His ways of thinking in themselves were certainly something that'd become very hurtful for him. He always seemed to be working, trying to make everything as impossibly perfect as they could be. Sometimes he would hardly get any sleep at all, trying to keep everything in order and trying to make sure he could improve upon his ideas. Sometimes he closed himself off from the world, clinging positively to all of his creations and on more than one occasion keeping them from the light of day, deciding that they "aren't good enough." Sometimes he doesn't feel he's good enough and he's been thinking that a lot lately. Does he tell any of his friends? Perhaps his friendly fatherly friend Patton? Virgil, who goes through his own issues and would certainly understand? Logan, his roommate and in truth someone he had some strange swirling feelings in his head for? Certainly not. He couldn't bear to make Patton sad, couldn't imagine putting even more weight on Virgil's shoulders and he wouldn't dare admit any of this to Logan.

Their friendship hadn't always been great and it definitely still had its issues to work out. They fought a lot, arguing on a number of things as if it was the clashing of logic and creativity, a war that neither of them was going to ever win and were just meaningless words spat at each other again and again. Even so, through these unorderly verbal sparring matches, they'd learned things about one another, understanding growing and a friendship blossoming from an initial distaste. With a blooming relationship came the unwanted wringing growth of the weed that was an attraction in this garden of friendship. He'd never imagined that Logan of all the people it could've been, his "Microsoft-nerd" was the one to steal his heart. It wasn't fair!

Logan was an incredibly serious and formal person, the kind who was always of a rational mind and thought things through. At first Roman had misread him as simply a nerd who he wouldn't have anything in common with - except perhaps their dual admiration of Crofters Jam. As it turned out he'd completely misunderstood the situation and, after some time, they'd gotten along pretty well. Though Logan could be a bit cold and analytical he certainly did care deeply for his friend's emotions and was not, in fact, an emotionless robot, and now Roman was one of those friends. As he began learning more about Long he, in turn, found himself warming up to him extremely well - a little too well when he thought about it. Now he had gone from hating being Logan's dorm mate because he didn't understand him to hate begging Logan's dorm mate because he did understand him. It was becoming agonizing, trying to hide these affections from someone who was so very good at figuring situations out and he was beginning to spread himself a little thin. This was an instance where his confidence he constantly boasted he had an excess supply of completely abandoned him. Of course, he couldn't tell Logan of his feelings! Who was he to match up with someone so ... so well cool! Everything about him was admirable, going into teaching the sciences to know so much about the world and all of its creatures. Never had Roman met someone so intelligent. He just didn't measure up and admitting the secret would dash any and all chances of remaining friends and so he stayed silent.

Perhaps it was how much Logan had been on his mind that stifled his creativity. He just couldn't get the guy out of his head, and now he was all he could think about, something that was becoming his ruin. He hadn't been sleeping or eating regularly and was so distraught with emotion. He didn't know what to do.

"Roman?" Roman was pulled from his thoughts to see Logan standing in the doorway of his room, leaning against the frame with a look of concern etched on to his face.

"Heya, teach!" Roman said, trying his best to make sure his voice was as boisterous as possible but what came out was somewhat of a strained sound, something on the verge of tears. He hadn't realigned how overcome with sorrow he'd been until he'd spoken aloud and his facade was crumbling before him. Logan's look of worry, something he never seemed to be, only deepened as he took a few steps towards Roman, making the creative man tense up even more so.

"Are you quite alright, Roman?" Logan asked, his voice softer than usual. Roman nodded assuringly, or what he thought appeared assuringly, trying his best to pull his lips into a warm smile.

"But of course I am! Feeling prim and proper as always. Why ... why do you ask?" Though his voice attempted to hold it's normal vibrato and poise he lacked to regain composure, his tone becoming weaker and more unstable with each word uttered. His hesitance was the icing on the cake that told Roman he was nothing but alright. Logan stood there, looking the room up and down. Papers were scattered across his desk and on the floor, some crumpled into balls and discarded in numerous locations, seems to have been violently tossed. And then there was princey himself. His hair was unkempt, something Roman always made sure was in check and he had dark circles under his eyes like he'd been messing with Virgil's eye makeup which under closer inspection he certainly had not.

"I can tell that that is, in fact, incorrect," Logan pointed out, Roman shuddering, "Your workspace is far more disorderly than usual. The light is dimmed and I know you under normal circumstances like to work in a bright setting. Your appearance - and try not to take offense to this - is lacking it's usual high maintenance. You appear to have slept fairly poorly as of recently and I can clearly see that you're trembling. It's late now and you still aren't in bed, meaning you haven't been keeping to the schedule I made you at all which is, though irritating, also concerning. Is something the matter?" Roman felt himself begin to shake more than he already was, feeling Logan's expectant gaze on him.

"Logan, really, I'm fi-."

"Falsehood," Logan interrupted swiftly, his facial expression seeming to express that he wasn't messing around, "You're lying to me." Roman bit his bottom lip, feeling to his utter horror an onslaught of tears forming behind his eyes. He'd never cried in front of his friends, hell, he'd hardly ever cried in front of anyone. It conveyed far too much emotion, peeled back the shell and exposed the tender and weak insides that he didn't want any person to see. He couldn't pull anything with Logan, he was just too smart, damn him and he was left out in the open. He squeezed his eyes shut, burying his hands in his face as if this hide from his friend.

"Logan ... please ... just don't do this right now." He sniffled, damn it, he actually sniffled, feeling his hands warmed by the sensation of tears. He heard the shuffling of feet against the floor and a sigh before he shuddered as a hand touched his shoulder. He didn't look of from his hands, couldn't in the moment and was stricken by surprise seeing as Logan didn't always understand emotions all that much, as he constantly expressed.

"Whatever's bothering you," he began after a prolonged moment of silence that'd been only filled with the sound of Roman crying, "I know that it will get better eventually. That's how things always work out."

"I'm - I'm not so sure about that one."

"Aren't you always sure of everything?" Roman chuckled darkly through his tears.

"Not nearly. I'm not really sure about anything right now, Logan. This isn't something I ... I should be talking about."

"And why's that?" Logan asked, begging to slowly massage into Roman's shoulder, appearing to make an attempt to calm him down which was just a little too heartwarming for Roman to handle. "We're companions are we not?"

"We are."

"Than you should tell me. It would be good to get out of your system. When someone is sad it is their friend's job, me in this case, to try and console them or figure out what the problem is. I should help you. I've never seen you so distraught, Roman, and honestly, it's very upsetting."

"I'm sorry for upsetting you ..." Roman muttered, snuffling and wiping his eyes. "I didn't mean to."

"There's absoluetly no need to apologize. You did nothing wrong," Logan assured.

"Yeah well ... it feels wrong." Logan sighed as Roman exposed his face, his hands falling to his side revealing puffy red eyes full of tears and a flustered face. It truly was a heartbreaking sight and Logan ... to his utter horror ... was experiencing feelings.

"Can you please tell me what it is that's making you feel this way?"

"I dunno, Logan," Roman said, voice still fragile, "I ... I don't think I'm up for that." Logan sighed thoughtfully, pausing for a moment before speaking.

"Alright then, not right now." The fact that "right now" was said enforced that this was not the end of the conversation, something that frightened Roman to no end but at least he'd nodded himself some time. "If you don't feel comfortable sharing with me just yet then I will respect your decision." Logan sighed, seeming to be thinking for a moment before speaking again. "I've... I've been told that when others are upset it is best to embrace them. Would I doing that for you improve your emotional condition perhaps?" Roman, even though his sorrow, cocked an eyebrow with a small smile on his lips.

"Yes. Yes I think that'd do some good perhaps," Roman said and Logan nodded.

"Ah alright. Well uh ... I mean I'm not very good with these things but -." He frowned, extending his arms and pulling to his feet before enveloping him in a tight hug. He was slightly rigid and stiff but nonetheless Roman melted into his touch in an instant, closing his eyes and breathing out in contentment, distracting him from his woes.

"Is this ... adequate?" Logan queried and Roman nodded against him, smiling softly.

"It's more than adequate, Logan. It's perfect."

Roman's head was still spinning and the stress was still weighing heavily, but in this moment of being in Logan's arms, it didn't seem to matter.

=+=

It had been a couple of days since Logan had caught Roman in his lowly state and though he'd calmed down some with the aid of the logical trait at the time, it didn't cease his gnawing worry. His concerns hadn't diminished, not nearly, and now he had an even more pressing issue on his mind. Logan and his impending conversation still hadn't happened.

At first, he thought – or perhaps prayed – that Logan had just forgotten about it all and dropped it completely. But of course, that hadn't happened and was simply wishful thinking. Logan never forgot information, especially if it was important and, damn it, this was important. Though Logan wasn't the best at dealing with issues of emotion he did his absolute best, Roman could see that. God, he wished he'd been able to see it before, back when he thought of Logan as an utter nuisance and one who sometimes brought the group down. He'd been so stupidly foolish not to see Logan for who he was ... but he didn't want to admit to that. Couldn't admit to that.

"Roman?" He was jerked from his thoughts when he looked to see Logan standing in front of him. He was seated on the sofa, not staring at anything particular, his mind wandering. He realized that Virgil and Patton who'd been there before had left, probably to go watch The Nightmare Before Christmas or something in Patton's room and snuggle. He hated to admit it but the puffball and emo nightmare was pretty gosh darn cute together, and he was happy that Virgil was finally becoming more at ease. He wished he could say the same about himself.

"Yes, Logan? Did you need me for something? A quest perhaps?" he tried, damn he really did try, to sound put together and calm in the presence of the Logical trait, but when push came to shove he sounded just as nervous as he felt and it was killing him. Logan looked at him, concern slipping through the cracks of his calm and professional exterior as he pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose, straightening them as he looked at Roman with a hand planted firmly on his hip.

"No, no, nothing of that sort. I've given you some time since we last had a serious conversation, and though I realize you haven't come to me saying that you are ready to have a talk, I'm afraid I cannot wait any longer. I would like to do so now, to work out an issue that we can determine. It isn't good to be upset and not tell anyone, and I don't want it to hinder you in any way." Roman tried to smile, though it looked just as plastered on as it was. He gulped, his throat suddenly feeling tight as he nodded, his back stiffening.

"Right, right. Sure thing, Microsoft Nerd. Let's talk," he said, a remark that under any other circumstance would earn a groan or some other sense of annoyance from Logan, but it never came. He simply looked worried, far more worried then he ever did any other time and that only seemed to worsen Roman's anxieties.

He was furious with himself for being as well ... afraid as he was. He was a prince, for crying out loud! Princes are supposed to be brave and strong, reliable and the vanquishers of evil. He was supposed to a protector, and his own stupid emotions weren't supposed to get in the way of that. He wasn't supposed to be a coward.

Logan sat down beside Roman, folding his hands in his lap and staring at the creative trait with almost piercing eyes. This wasn't going to be good but Roman didn't have any way out. If he could just muscle through this without revealing too much he would be in the clear, he would be alright. Yeah right. Like he could outsmart Logan.

"So," Logan said, slicing through the silence that had hung in the air for a few too many moments, "What seems to be the trouble?" The question, though simple, hit Roman all together like a speeding bullet. What seems to be the trouble? The real question should've been what didn't seem to be the trouble. It was obvious that people didn't value princes as much anymore, and all those who watched the videos in turn no longer valued him. He was no longer important, and if he wasn't important to the viewers that were keeping Thomas employed, then how long would it be until the other sides no longer valued him? He needed to fix things, to be better and come up with better ideas. Nothing was good enough, though, damn it nothing was working. He'd been trying so hard, having so much on his mind but keeping it all to himself. He wasn't enough for anyone, not even himself. And his newfound attachment to Logan, accursed and unwanted as it was, was just the cherry on top of all of this. They were finally beginning to slowly come to an understanding and become more friendly with one another, but his heart just had to become enraptured by Logan and everything he was. He was just so cool; in a way, he didn't understand. How could he compare? He couldn't.

"Roman? Roman, what's wrong?" He blinked, realizing that there were already tears brewing in his eyes. This was all it took to break him now, concern about his well being. How had he gotten to such a lowly state? How could be such a dunce? Such a disappointment. He really did think that he would be ready for this, to come forward enough to dodge Logan's suppositions but now he's ruined it all once again.

"I-I ... Logan, how's about we do this a little later? I, uh," he faked a yawn, blinking away his tears and though he was an astounding actor it certainly wasn't an award-winning performance, "I'm feeling pretty tired so I'm going to head to bed and we'll talk about this -." Though he began to rise from the couch suddenly a hand clamped around his wrist and he looked to see Logan holding him in place and forcing him to sit back down. He was trapped, and it only made his heart race more so.

"Roman, please, I told you I wanted to do this now and I meant it. It's obvious that something is upsetting you greatly and I would be letting you down as a friend if I didn't press you more on this. I know that it may be making you angry, and I do not mean to do that, but I also will not allow you to wriggle away without any sort of an explanation. I can't read your mind, Roman. Far from it, and as such, I can't and don't know what it is that's going through your head. I don't think any of the others know what's going on either, epically not Thomas. You must understand that though you may think you're protecting yourself from whatever this is, you're really hurting yourself. Let's talk it through and figure out what it is that's the matter. We can do it together." Logan's speech, though with only the best of intentions and concerns hit Roman like a truck, shattering the walls he'd built up completely. The tears that had been pooling in his eyes suddenly began flowing down Roman's cheeks, the warmth unwelcome and despised. He looked away from Logan, letting out a trembling and broken breath. Logan, without him realizing it, had grabbed his hand and laced their fingers together, giving him a squeeze and holding tight. He hadn't any idea he being upset could push Logan to already be so comforting, and he would've focused on it more if he wasn't currently breaking down.

"I'm ---- I-I'm not enough," he finally said through a choked sob, squeezing his eyes shut, his face crumpling. He didn't want to see Logan's face; didn't want to know what he was thinking. He could hardly imagine it.

"What do you mean by that?" Logan asked, not letting go of his hand. Roman shuddered.

"My ideas ... t-they don't m-measure up to w-what they're supposed to. I-it isn't going to b-be enough t-to prove m-myself."

"To prove yourself?" Logan queried, and Roman could hear the skepticism in his voice, though there was no judgment. "Why on earth would you need to prove yourself in any way? You're Thomas's creativity, you're a very necessary part of him, epically considering the field that he's taken up. He needs you very much. We ..." he paused, the words seeming to be caught on his tongue for a moment. He swallowed hard enough for Roman to hear. "We all need you." Roman, at this moment, seemed to have completely shattered, the tears falling fast and sobs racking his body. He trembled and instantly Logan felt it, his grip tightening as if his holding of Roman's hand would somehow bring him back down.

"B-but I do, Logan! D-d-don't you see?! I-I'm n-n-not enough a-and n-now no one will e-ever l-like me again!" He chocked out, "I-I wasn't s-strong enough a-and I wasn't g-good enough. I never w-was for anyone." In his state of shock, he for a moment let go of Roman's hand, and though it was brief it was enough for him to curl away and crumple in on himself, crying loudly as if in pain. It was loud and terrible and was enough to make Logan feel more emotions than he thought he physically could in one sitting. This was truly loving someone, he realized because seeing Roman break hurt him more than he could say. He, with a now trembling hand, reached out and placed it on the small of Roman's back, making him shiver a bit more, his sobs shaky and uneasy.

"Roman ... I ..." For once, Logan was left utterly speechless, but it didn't take long to regain his bearings. There wasn't time for this nonsense. "People don't just like you, people love you. Your ideas are always so wildly creative I ... I myself can hardly comprehend it. Though I don't always understand your love of theater and storytelling, I understand you far more and that's enough. I also understand that you are in a lot of pain, but all that you've told he has been a falsehood. You're incredibly strong. Stronger than most."

"I'm a c-coward," Roman hissed like a wounded animal. Logan shook his head, though he knew the creative side couldn't see. Logan began slowly rubbing circles into the princely man's back, something that felt awkward but he'd heard had tended to work in calming people down.

"You aren't a coward, Roman. You're .... you're probably one of the bravest out there," Logan said, each word dripping with severity and honesty. "I promise you, I know that you aren't." Roman guffawed, his voice beyond broken.

"Yeah right, I can't e-even tell you how I feel," he said as if his fears had been overwrought by his grief.

"What do you mean?" Logan asked, his heart rate suddenly, for some reason, increasing. He didn't understand what Roman was referring to.

"Exactly," Roman said, letting out a shaky sigh, "You don't know, a-and why would you? W-why would you know that I'm fucking I-in love with you. W-why would you ever -."

"W-wait," Logan interrupted, his breath catching in the back of his throat, "You love me? Me?" Roman trembled like a leaf, looking anything but brave as a single word was uttered through his cries.

"Yes." For once, Logan was delivered news that he could hardly comprehend. He just couldn't. How was it at all possible that the man that he'd been falling for all of this time who had always, somehow, seemed miles out of his league felt the same way? He already didn't know what to do with his own useless and confusing emotions, but having them reciprocated was a far different story. What was he supposed to do about that? He loathed all of these feelings that'd been running rampant in his head; they were simply far to illogic. He wasn't supposed to fall for anyone and to steal into the emotions that he hardly knew he had. In all honesty, he'd planned on ignoring them completely, truly believing that it was for the best but now he could see that he was being forced to deal with this head-on.

"Roman - I .... there's something I think you should know," he started, his voice uncharacteristically uneasy.

"I'm s-sorry -." Roman muttered through sniffles, "I'm sorry I'm s-such a screw-up." Logan needed to take action and fast if he wanted to fix things, or at least begin to aid in Roman's healing process. He took a deep breath before bringing his hands up to Roman's face, cupping his cheeks and wiping away his falling tears. Roam squeezed his eyes shut, unable to face Logan, his face flushed from embarrassment and his tears.

"Roman, listen to me when I tell you that you're wrong. You aren't a screw-up, far from it. We desperately need you, and .... and I'm sorry if I don't express that enough, but it's true. Without you, we wouldn't be anywhere good. People love you so dearly, Roman. The fans, Patton, Virgil ..." he sighed, swallowing down his nerves, "... myself. I haven't been fully honest with you, and I'm sincerely sorry for that." Roman's eyes slowly opened, red and puffy as a look of confusion broke through the sorrow.

"What .... what're you talking about?" Roman asked in a small voice, bordering on a whisper. A smile, an actual genuine smile, spread across Logan's face, something that seemed so unnatural for him. All of this did.

"Roman, I... I share your romantic feelings. I wasn't going to tell you because well I-I figured it would only be for the best if I kept it to myself, but it's true. Please, calm down. It's going to be alright." Roman snuffled, staring wide-eyed at Logan who was caressing his cheeks when the pad of his thumb. His breath hitched.

"You're - you're lying," he hissed, uncertainness and fear weighing heavy on his mind.

"I wouldn't lie to you, Roman. I'm telling the truth." Roman blinked, his heart racing as he stared at Roman who held him so close.

"How ...... how am I supposed to believe you?" Just as the question left Roman's lips Logan felt a sprig of confidence blossom inside of him suddenly he surged forward, closing the gap between them and shutting his eyes. Roman let out a gasp involuntarily, going stiff as a board as Roman cupped his cheeks with his hand and kissed him. It only took a fleeting moment, however, for him to melt into Logan's embrace, his eyes closing as he kissed back, placing his hands on Logan's hips and forcing him nearer. The kiss, though exceptional, didn't last long, Logan pulling back slightly, their noses pressing together and hands still imprinted on his face.

"Do you believe me now?" He asked, his breath ticking at Roman's neck as both of their faces burned bright red. Roman's heart swelled as a small smile crept onto his lips as he nearly collapsed on top of Logan, pulling him into a bone-crushing hug and crying softly into his shirt, no longer out of sadness. Logan continued to rub circles into his back and remind him that he was alright and that he mattered so, so much.

It took Roman some time, but he eventually calmed down completely, allowing many more kisses to be shared and although Roman had become more steady, he still held him as close as he could, just in case. He informed Roman about the fact that he would need to tell the others that he was feeling this way eventually, which he understood but was apprehensive about nonetheless. All in all, though, he knew that somehow things would be alright. He had Logan in a way he never thought he would be able, and for once in a long time, he felt happy. He felt like he was enough. 

=+=


End file.
